Fic: A Traitor in the House of Odin (1/14)

[bookishwench]

“You’re sure you brought your toothbrush?”

“Yes, May,” Peter said as they rode up in the elevator at Avengers Tower.

“And plenty of clean socks? You don’t know what it will be like there. It could be colder than you’re expecting. Or rainy.”

“I brought two pairs for every day,” Peter assured her.

“And underwear? You packed underwear, right?” May asked as the doors opened, revealing Tony, Thor, and Loki waiting for them.

“Yes,” Peter squeaked, embarrassed as a grin from Tony made it clear everyone had heard about his underwear. “Really, May, I’m all set. You don’t have to worry about me.”

“Worrying about you is my prerogative as your guardian. Hello,” she said, turning to the three men. “I hope we’re not late.”

“Not at all,” Thor said with an amused smile.

“And you’re sure he doesn’t need a passport or any shots?” May asked.

“No. We actually had to have the entire population of Asgard vaccinated because of him, but he should be fine,” Loki said. “I must admit, they’re rather testy about that.”

Peter looked horrified until Loki abruptly laughed.

“I’m joking,” he said. “No, Lady May, everything is perfectly fine. I assure you, we will return your nephew to you with minimal damage.”

“Sorry,” she said, wincing. “I don’t want to be overprotective but—”

“But like you said, guardian’s prerogative,” Tony finished. “It’s not like the kid’s going around the corner for a burger. Considering he’s traveling to another planet, I’d say the concern is justified.”

Peter shifted his duffle bag to his other hand, looking awkward. After Loki had announced on Christmas Eve that Peter was invited to visit Asgard, Peter had been able to think of almost nothing else. He had spun a small web for himself in the corner of the Bartons’ living room and tried to sleep, but instead all he could think about was that in only a couple days, he would be whooshing across the universe via Bifrost to see a completely different civilization. He was thrilled. He was curious. He was also a complete nervous wreck.

Breakfast that Christmas morning had involved more eggs than Peter had known existed in North America followed by literally gallons of coffee, a bakery’s worth of toast, an inexhaustible number of buttered blueberry pancakes smothered in real maple syrup, a sea of biscuits so light they were in danger of floating away, and enough bacon to reconstruct a whole pig. Everyone also got a chocolate chip cookie after breakfast, which appeared to be a Barton family tradition. The Avengers had opted not to do a gift exchange this year, but the Barton children did open their gifts under the tree with a rather large audience looking on.

“So, how did everyone sleep?” Natasha asked as she sat down on the couch, sipping another cup of coffee.

“Everyone in my room snored,” Loki said, shuddering. “Thor I knew about, but Bruce, Happy, and Rhodey were an unpleasant surprise.”

“Says the blanket hog,” Bruce said.

“I do not hog blankets,” Loki said, looking offended.

“You do,” Thor said, “though not mine for once. I slept on the floor and wound up pulling nine Legos out of my back.”

“Ow,” Rhodey said. “Stepping on them is bad enough. I wound up sleeping in a desk chair. My spine’s a corkscrew.”

Happy said nothing, continuing to sip his coffee with an air of general suspicion, which for him was normal.

“The kids and I slept great, well, except for them trying to get up at three o’clock to get to the tree,” Natasha said.

“Our room stayed up a bit past when we should have,” Frigga said, smiling, then wiggled her fingertips, which were now a glittery silver. “We painted one another’s nails and traded stories far into the night. It was really quite amusing. May would make an excellent bard.”

“What stories?” both Peter and Loki had asked at precisely the same moment with nearly identical looks of horror.

“Nothing too colorful,” May said, laughing. “No family secrets were divulged.”

“And while all that was going on, we slept,” Tony said, shrugging. “Captain America strictly enforced bedtime. Also, I slept with Bucky’s arm poking me in the back half the night, which was really weird since he was on the other side of the room. Plus, I learned Fury talks in his sleep.”

Nick quirked an eyebrow at him and said, “What did I say?”

“Nothing much,” Tony said. “Nuclear codes. Who shot JFK. Roswell. Your social security number. You think Angela Merkel is hot. That kind of stuff.”

Sam slugged Tony and said, “No, Nick, nothing like that. You just kept talking about a goose. You did seem kind of upset.”

Nick shuddered and drank his entire cup of coffee in one go.

The school bus had been left in the Bartons’ front yard for Tony’s people to tow away later, and within a few hours everyone had caught a ride back in one of the two Quinjets or gone back to Asgard via Bifrost. Laura and Clint had remained home, of course, spending the rest of the day slumped in chairs in the living room, too tired to do more than occasionally grunt.

The next two days had passed quickly, and while Ned had been in awe when Peter told him about his upcoming trip, May had proven less enthusiastic. Now, standing in Tony’s living room, she looked on the verge of revoking her permission.

“I assure you, everything will go smoothly,” Thor said, putting a calming hand on her shoulder. “All will be well. He shall have my full protection.”

“And my ax!” Loki boomed, earning stares all around. “What? I rather like Gimli. I thought everyone here would get the reference.”

“Who?” Thor asked.

“I thought everyone here who matter would get the reference,” Loki amended. “Anyway, Peter will be fine, and if he isn’t, we’ll find you a new nephew to replace this one,” Loki said off-handedly, but May’s look of terror immediately made him backpedal. “No, no! Really, it will be fine! I apologize, dear lady. I fear my sense of humor may be slightly inappropriate on occasion.”

Thor gave him a look that suggested that was a gross understatement.

“We shall return here in four days’ time,” Thor said, smiling. “Heimdall will put us back down right on the helipad.”

“Yes, and the Bifrost should be ready by now,” Loki said, turning to Peter. “Did you happen to eat much this morning?”

“Uh, not really,” Peter said.

“Wise,” Loki said. “The Bifrost takes a little getting used to, but with the amount of time you spend swinging madly about the city, I think your stomach should be fine. Just hang onto your bag tightly or it may end up in another realm.”

“That’s what really happens to lost baggage at the airport,” Tony whispered dramatically. “Shh. Don’t tell anybody.”

“Actually, in some cases, that’s quite true,” Loki said. “Anyway, it’s time.”

“Bye, May,” Peter said, giving her a quick hug. “I’ll be okay.”

“I know,” she said, smiling a little too brightly. “Have fun!”

The two Aesir and Peter walked out onto the helipad and were almost immediately engulfed in a brilliant light, then disappeared. May’s smile dissolved immediately as her entire frame sagged.

“Nice job keeping up a brave front. Do you want a drink?” Tony asked.

“Oh, hell yeah,” May said. “Got any scotch?”

“Duh,” he said. “Think I’ll have one myself. I mean, he’ll be fine, no problem.”

“Of course.”

“What could possibly happen?”

May stared at him in disbelief, then said, “You didn’t really just say that, did you?”

“Uh… no? That’d be a major jinx if I did, and as a genius, I am not that stupid,” Tony said, smiling weakly and getting down two very large glasses that he proceeded to fill to the rim.